She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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