A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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