Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
