He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
