porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
