Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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