We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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