Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
