I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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