i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
