i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
