what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
