I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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