It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
All I want is dick and wine.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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