You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
