Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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