It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
