What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Randomize
