I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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