My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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