just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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