No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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