i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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