I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
