she was so not down for the gang bang
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
