Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
you made out with another girl for some wings
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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