He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Sorry my hands just texted you
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
