wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
