Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
