All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
