For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I will pee on everything he values.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
