i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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