I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
