Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
