paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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