Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
