i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
