"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just cropdusted the office
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
