I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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