I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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