You work out of a Hotel?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
