That's intense
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
