Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
