he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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