OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I want to have your abortion
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize