is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
