i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
