is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Operation Purity has been aborted
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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