Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
