I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
